


Summer of Change

by Marmeladeskies



Series: The Kids Are Alright (Now)-Series [4]
Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Baby, Childbirth, Family, Family Feels, Fluff, M/M, Making Out, New Sibling, Other, Smoking, Teenage Drama, Teenagers, kid!AU, sequel to The Kids Are Alright (Now), teenage shenenigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-28
Updated: 2020-03-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:14:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23359093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marmeladeskies/pseuds/Marmeladeskies
Summary: Neil is on his trip to Europe, and Andrew is home all summer, trying not to overthink how things were between them before Neil left. But two months of summer is a long time, and, like it usually does, summer brings change with it.
Relationships: Andrew Minyard/Roland, Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Series: The Kids Are Alright (Now)-Series [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1103223
Comments: 96
Kudos: 455





	Summer of Change

**Author's Note:**

> sorry that I made you wait for so long. This god damn quarantine is good for something, after all. Enjoy <3 
> 
> Come talk to me on tumblr, my handle is marmelade-sky :)

“Hop in, losers!”

“Nicky, you’re not cool or anything just because you have a car now. I need you to understand that.” Andrew plops down on the backseat as Aaron climbs into the front seat. 

Nicky, wearing the biggest sunglasses Andrew has ever seen, turns around to shoot him a dirty look. “You can get right out of my uncool car and walk to the pool if you don’t shut up.” 

Andrew rolls his eyes at him, but is quiet, because it’s way too warm outside to walk. 

“Thought so.”, Nicky snaps and turns back around. 

Once they’re out of their road, Nicky steps on the gas pedal, and the trees start rushing by outside the car. Andrew bets Nicky’s parents would take away the car if they knew how he drives. 

Nicky has the radio on at blaring volume, and so Andrew leans back and lets his thoughts wander as they drive.

They land on Neil, like they always do these days. 

He wonders what Neil is up to, if he’s having a good time. It’s only been a week, but Andrew feels like he hasn’t seen Neil in forever. He thinks back to that last night before Neil left, and then that morning.

Andrew’s been thinking about that a lot, lately, picking their interaction apart in his head. He wonders what Neil meant, what his intentions were. He wonders if Neil… knows. Wonders if Neil realized what all of that meant to him, Andrew. 

Knowing Neil, it’s entirely possible that he didn’t realize at all. 

Andrew tries not to get his hopes up.

He knows he’s failing. 

-

The pool is super crowded, and they see a bunch of people from school. 

Nicky immediately leaves them to find his group of girl friends, who are all 16 like Nicky, and cheerleaders, and make Aaron drool all over himself whenever he manages to steal glances at them. 

Aaron and Andrew go looking for Kevin. 

They find him somewhere on the lawn, with Jeremy and Sara, all three of them reading, which is something Andrew could definitely get in on. He still hasn’t gotten around to reading that Raven Boys book, after all. 

“Hey, nerds.” Aaron throws his towel at Kevin’s head, startling him. 

Jeremy gives Andrew a sunny smile when he spots him.

They’ve kind of been hanging out a little recently, all of them together, and Andrew doesn’t feel awkward around him anymore. “Hi.”

Sara sits up when she spots them, closing her book and pointing at Aaron. “You. Come with me. They’ve got the diving platforms open.” 

“Hell yeah!”, Aaron replies, a huge grin splitting his face.

Sara seems to be the only girl Aaron manages not to ogle. 

They run off together while Andrew spreads his towel and sits down with Kevin and Jeremy, getting comfortable for a day with absolutely no obligations.

Kevin asks him if he saw the national team play last night, and they chat a bit, Jeremy weighing in, but eventually, Kevin goes back to reading, Jeremy gets out his earphones, and Andrew decides that he wants to start his book, too.

Right when he opens his book, though, he sees him: that boy.

Andrew doesn’t know who he is, he’s never seen him around the pool before this summer. He knows that for sure because he would have noticed, because… because he’s so hot. Andrew feels daring just thinking that word in relation to a boy he kind of likes looking at. But he is- dark, really smooth skin that makes his bright red swim trunks stand out, a mess of curls that he sometimes puts in some sort of bun, and a really bright smile that shows off the whitest teeth Andrew has ever seen. 

Whenever Andrew can, he steals a glance. He wonders if the boy goes to Nicky’s school (he must be a little older than him) or if he’s visiting someone in the area, maybe family. 

Andrew likes looking at that boy entirely too much, but then again, at least that keeps him from thinking about Neil all the time. 

And maybe that’s a good thing. Because, really, what does he think is going to happen? His best friend magically falling in love with him? Slim chance. Neil probably isn’t even into boys at all. There’s chance Neil is into no-one at all. 

The more Andrew thinks about it, the more he comes to the conclusion that the risk is probably not worth the outcome. What use is it if he tells Neil that he likes him, making it awkward between them? No. He’s going to keep his mouth shut. Aren’t crushes one of those things that go away with time?

The boy is definitely a welcome distraction.

“What’cha looking at?”

Jeremy rips him out of his deep thoughts with his sunshine-y voice, making Andrew startle and sheepishly take his eyes off that boy.

Too late, though; Jeremy is already following his gaze. 

The thing is, the boy isn’t here alone, he’s with a bunch of guys his age. So, at least, Jeremy won’t be able to pinpoint-

“Red shorts?” Jeremy asks, low enough for Kevin not to hear, and smirks up at him. But before he can open his damn mouth and say anything else, Andrew is already smothering him with his open book. 

-

That’s how their days go. 

Occasionally, they’ll play exy, or go to the mall to get ice cream, but mostly, they’re at the pool. And Andrew has to admit, it’s not half bad. Obviously, it would be nicer with Neil there, but it’s still okay with Kevin, and Jeremy, and Sara, and sometimes Renee. One time, Renee’s mom offers to drive them to the beach which is also really nice. 

Nicky also drives them around a lot, which Andrew thinks is probably more because he can drive now and wants to show off instead of him just being a good cousin. 

They’re on their way home when they stop at a red light. Aaron is dozing and listening to music, and Andrew is still reading his book, so neither of them register Nicky letting down the window at first, until he yells out: “Hey, Roland!”

Andrew, startled, looks up and around to see who Nicky is greeting- only to almost have a heart attack.

Red Shorts Boy is waving back at Nicky, sitting on a sharp-looking yellow bike, still dressed in those shorts and a t-shirt. 

“Who’s that?” The question comes out embarrassingly high-pitched, but Andrew can’t help it.

Nicky giggles- honest to god  _ giggles _ \- and half-turns in his seat, eyeing Andrew over the rim of his sunglasses. 

Andrew can feel a blush shoot into his cheeks.

“Roland. He’s in my class, but only just moved here right before the end of the school year.”, he says. That’s all he says, but in combination with his look, Andrew feels like he just bared his inner thoughts to Nicky. 

The light turns green and Nicky turns his eyes back on the road, driving off with one last wave to Red Shorts Boy- Roland. 

Andrew can’t not look at him and the way his calves flex when he drives off on his bike. 

-

That night, Andrew’s on facebook. 

He doesn’t really post on there a lot, compared to, say, Kevin, who religiously posts Exy related stuff or Jeremy, who’s entire wall is a mess of articles he shared, motivational posters, cat memes and dozens of girl friends leaving disgustingly sweet “I miss u so much jerebear hehe <3” posts. 

Andrew isn’t even on there much at all. But tonight he’s on a mission: find out more about Roland. 

There’s a bit of guilt coming with this entire ordeal, but it’s not enough to keep him from doing it. It’s also surprisingly easy to find him. His profile is kind of plain- Roland LeBlanc, a handsome profile picture of him smiling in the sun and wearing a polo shirt, incredible teeth showing. 

As Andrew scrolls downwards, he discovers the reason behind those perfect teeth: his parents, whose profiles are linked to Roland’s, are apparently both dentists. 

The move here is marked in Roland’s profile, as well as the change of schools. 

Andrew pauses, trying not to ponder how weird this is what he’s doing right now.

He doesn’t even know why exactly he is doing it. 

He clicks back to his front page- and is hit by a photo of Neil. 

Neil never posts on facebook. He doesn’t even have a profile picture on- well, he hadn’t, until now. It shows Neil from the side, and it was obviously shot with a good camera. The lighting is perfect, and his tousled, auburn hair stands out against the gray sky behind him. 

It’s a really nice photo. 

Andrew hesitates, then clicks on the little chat box in the lower right corner. 

_ nice pic _

He feels stupid the second he sends it. 

_ who took that? _

To his surprise, Neil is actually typing almost immediately. 

_ hi :) thank you! Allison took it, she’s a new friend I met here. _

Allison.

Andrew immediately feels the searing hot pang of jealousy. Instead of replying to Neil, he clicks to Neil’s profile. And there it is: “Neil Josten is now friends with Allison J. Reynolds”. That damn, overly sophisticated J. 

Andrew clicks her profile.

She’s pretty. Pretty enough that she probably gets random friend requests from boys like Aaron on facebook. Pretty in a pristine, blonde way.

Andrew instantly hates her. 

Neil sends another message, asking about how Andrew is feeling.

_ sry, gtg. exy practice.  _ is all Andrew writes back before he logs off and slams his laptop shut.

-

A few days later, Andrew is walking Monster. He had to wait for the sun to almost go down before taking her for a walk because it’s so hot during the day that all she does is pee and then shoot him suffering looks like she wants to go back home and lie down on the cool tile floor of the kitchen. Which he gets. 

Him and Neil haven’t talked since that evening Andrew discovered the photo. Andrew admits that he’s avoiding Neil. It’s his own fault, really- just like he predicted, he got his hopes up and then got his feelings hurt, which is the single most stupid thing to ever happen EVER. 

He’s listening to music while walking, My Chemical Romance, and wallowing in his self-pity. Meanwhile, Neil is probably having fun in England, running around London with pretty blond girls-

Monster tugs on the leash because someone is walking by, and Andrew holds on a little harder, making sure she doesn’t greet somebody who doesn’t want to be greeted. It pulls him out of his thoughts and he looks up to see whoever-

“Hi!”

It’s Red Shorts Boy. Roland.

Andrew feels like he just ran into a wall; it slows him down considerably.

“H-hi.”

Monster uses the opportunity to curiously sniff at Roland’s leg and wag her tail a little. 

“Sorry, I think I know you from the pool, right?”, Roland asks, and one of his hands goes to the back of his neck, tugging on his hair a little. He wears it in dreads now, and it looks really, really good like that. 

“Uh, yeah.”, Andrew stammers, his heart skipping a few beats at once. “I’m Nicky’s cousin.”

“Oh! Cool. He’s… he’s in my math class, I think. I’m not sure, though, I just transferred here.” Roland laughs a little awkwardly and Andrew can feel his vision get narrow from this shock of cuteness. 

“Is this your dog?” Roland leans down and carefully holds out a hand for Monster, the way people who don’t have a lot of experience with dogs sometimes do. She accepts it graciously and nudges it with her snout. 

“Yeah. She’s my...” -emotional support, Andrew doesn’t say, “-dog. Her name’s Monster.”

“Monster?” Roland looks half up at him, laughing a little. That laugh shows off his teeth. “That’s cute.” 

Him actually saying ‘cute’ out loud gives Andrew the rest. He has no idea how he’s going to recover from this.

“Thanks.” He wishes he could secretly communicate with Jeremy right now; Jeremy probably knows how to talk to cute boys. “Are you… are you on your way to the pool?”

Roland, who’s now petting Monster’s head tentatively, shakes his head. “No, unfortunately not. I’m summer jobbing.” 

“Oh.”, Andrew says, genuinely a little surprised. Who would have thought a dentists’ son does summer jobs. Probably some kind of parental requirement. “What do you do?”

“I mow old people’s lawns.” Roland rolls his eyes a bit, but smiles when he does. “It’s fine. I get a lot of lemonade out of it.” 

Andrew feels himself give Roland an unintentional grin- not unlike the ones that are usually reserved for Neil. “Sounds like a good deal.”

Roland shrugs. “It’s fine. Hey, are you coming friday night?” He rights himself when he asks it, and Andrew notices that he’s got a few inches on him. 

“What’s friday?” Andrew feels horribly uninformed immediately, especially when Roland gets that glint in his eyes. 

“Oh,I thought Nicky might have told you.”

Andrew tries hard not to squint. “Told me what?” 

Roland bites his lip, worries at it for a second, and then pulls a grimace. “...I’m not, like, supposed to tell anyone but…” He steps closer. Andrew’s breathing turns shallow. “-...a bunch of people from school have been breaking into the pool at night, after it’s closed. Can’t be too many so we won’t get caught, but, y’know.” He gives Andrew a wink. “...’d be cool to see you there next time.” 

Andrew manages a dumb nod.

“Anyways!” Roland returns to his cheerful tone, “I’m off to my job. See you soon?” He gives Andrew a wink, and steps backwards.

“...see you.” Andrew settles for a neutral, manly nod. 

-

“Why didn’t you tell me you guys were breaking into the pool!”

On the other end of the line, Nicky has the audacity to scoff. “Because you’re a baby!” 

“I’m NOT a baby!”

“How do you even know?!”

“Roland told me!”

“Roland?! How do you know Roland?” 

Nicky’s incredulous and vaguely impressed tone is at least a little satisfying. 

“Doesn’t matter!”, Andrew replies indignantly, “What matters is you withheld information.”

Now Nicky is laughing again. Fucker. 

“Chill. You can come, if you’re so dead set on it. Just don’t bring any of your little friends.”

Andrew wants to tell Nicky he’s an ass, but he kind of fear that that might have negative effects on the invitation. 

“Thank you.”, has says instead, as ironically as he can. 

Nicky gives a dismissive noise and then tells him he needs to hang up to go to the mall with his friends.

-

Friday night, Andrew lies to Dad and says he’s going to Kevin’s house for movies, and then spends an hour overthinking his swim trunks and this entire thing.

He swears he’s going to go home if there is any chance of embarrassing himself. 

He leaves at around 7, and mills around for an hour until Nicky picks him up. 

They pick up a few more of Nicky’s friends, all girls, and they all seem to think it’s funny to call Andrew ‘cute’. At least they get milkshakes before driving to the pool.

Still, he’s very glad when he can finally get out of the car once they’re there.

The parking lot is surprisingly full, considering that this is supposed to be a secret thing. Andrew spots a few older people from school huddling in the bushes around the pool‘s fence. Smoke is curling in the air, and as they come closer, Andrew smells something sickly sweet and rich which he assumes is probably weed. 

He suddenly feels extremely grown up and very out of his depths at the same time. 

Nicky and his friends greet a group of boys from their grade, and Andrew just hangs back. 

-

It turns out, all they have to do is climb a fence. 

Andrew goes last. He hasn‘t seen Roland anywhere so far, and he‘s starting to feel silly. 

Inside the perimeter, people are already getting undressed down to their bathing suits and jumping into the pool, laughing and splashing each other. A few others are sitting by the loungers, cracking open bottles of booze and handing them around. 

Shit.

If Mom and Dad ever find out about this, Andrew is so screwed. 

„You came!“ 

A familiar voice rips Andrew out of his thoughts and makes him turn around. Roland drops down from the fence, landing a few feet behind Andrew and righting himself after a little stumble.

Andrew‘s cheeks betray him by flexing, making him give Roland a lopsided smile. 

„I did.“

„Awesome.“ 

They stand in front of each other awkwardly for a moment. Andrew feels his stomach flutter. 

Roland breaks the silence first. 

„Do you, like, drink or smoke or anything?“

Andrew shrugs. What if he says no and Roland thinks that‘s lame? But he doesn‘t want to lie either. 

He settles for a really dumb middle. 

„Don‘t drink, but I smoke sometimes.“ 

Liar. 

Also, he realizes that instant that he made a big mistake. 

„Cool, you wanna have a smoke with me?“ It seems like Roland isn‘t too keen on mingling just yet either. 

Andrew can‘t get out of this now, and so he nods before following Roland, who leads him away from crowd, and behind a shed. 

Back here, people‘s voices are muffled, and the weed smell isn‘t as strong.

Roland sits down, back against the wall of the shed, and lets his head drop backwards against it with a litte sigh and a smile in Andrew‘s direction. 

Andrew does the same, feeling shaky.

But Roland doesn‘t make it awkward. „Man, I‘m fucked.“, he laughs, and it‘s gorgeous and infectious. Andrew can feel himself grin. 

„Mowing old people‘s lawn is hard work!“, Roland defends himself, still laughing, „You can‘t imagine how exact some of those geezers are! I swear, they get out the tape measure as soon as I‘m done.“

Andrew laughs, and doesn‘t feel that tense anymore. 

„Why do you even have a summer job? Aren‘t your parents, like, doctors?“ Yikes. Andrew cringes; how is he supposed to know that?! He‘s going to give himself away and fucking embarrass himself-

But Roland doesn‘t even mind, he just shrugs. „After their divorce, things got a little tighter, I guess.“

Shit. „Fuck, I‘m sorry.“ 

„Eh. It‘s okay.“ Roland waves a hand around, gesturing vaguely. „The job‘s a good excuse to get out of the house, too.“ 

He shifts, producing a squashed box of cigarettes from his back pocket. He opens it and offers it to Andrew.

Andrew swallows hard, looking down at the pack of cigarettes for a second before reaching out and taking one.

He’s seen people smoke in movies and on tv shows before, so he kind of knows what to do with the cigarette, but it still feels really awkward in his hand. 

The second he puts it between his lips, the dusty, sour smell hits him.

Meanwhile, Roland has grabbed one for himself and produced a lighter that he’s now holding out towards Andrew in a silent offer to light it for him. 

Andrew leans in.

Roland presses his thumb down and, with a click, the flame springs to life. 

The tip ignites into orange embers, Andrew draws in a breath, and their eyes meet-

And then Andrew starts coughing. 

The smoke is so vile, so sharp in his lungs- he inhaled way too hard, and it hurts, and he’s fucking embarrassing himself.

When he manages to stop coughing, the smoke becomes a disgusting feeling and taste on his tongue. His eyes water a little. 

A nightmare.

Roland looks at him- meanwhile having lit his own cigarette with way less drama- brows raised, the trace of a grin on his lips. 

“You okay?”, he asks when Andrew’s coughing subsides. 

Andrew manages a gruff “Yea”, and then swallows hard. 

He wishes he had something to drink.

Roland looks at him for a long moment, and then says “...you’ve never smoked before, have you?”

And Andrew thinks that this is it. He messed up. He’s done for. Roland knows he’s an imposter, a fucking baby like Nicky said-

“Come on, give that to me.” Roland holds out his hand, and he’s actually… smiling. And it’s not mean or mocking, it’s a proper smile.

Andrew feels his cheeks burn like his throat does right now. 

He hands Roland the cigarette clumsily and Roland gently drags the tip over the asphalt, stubbing it out. 

“Don’t start.”, he says as he does it, “It actually really sucks.” 

“Why do you smoke, then?”, Andrew asks, finally finding his voice again. His mouth still feels disgusting.

Roland shrugs. “My ex boyfriend kind of got me into it back when I was really stressed about my parents’ divorce.” 

Andrew feels like the world has stopped for a second.

Ex boyfriend.

_ Ex boyfriend. _

Boyfriend. 

“Oh.” He feels like he should say more; like he ought to say more, make their… similarity known somehow, and at the same time, his heart is skipping multiple beats, but it feels different to when it does that around Neil; he feels it lower in his stomach, and on the back of his neck. 

Roland lazily rolls his head to the side to shoot Andrew another grin.

“Oh?”

“I mean… kind of sucks that he got you into smoking as a coping mechanism.” Andrew can see Bee nod her head in his mind right now. He tries to forget about her immediately. 

Roland shrugs again. “Yeah. I guess that’s why he’s my ex.” 

They fall into silence for a minute or so while Roland slowly smokes. Andrew watches the smoke curl into the dark, star-lit sky. 

He still feels like he needs to say something, anything, to let Roland know- it feels like it’s about to break out of him, which is weird because no one but his family and Neil really know yet, and yet… and yet… it feels almost inevitable that it’s going to come out. Like it needs to.

“Uh. Just. So you know. I’m… too.” That’s how he says it, quiet, looking down at his shoes because it feels dangerous to look at Roland right now. 

“You’re what?”, Roland asks, and Andrew can’t believe he has to elaborate right now. He takes a deep inhale, preparing to say it, but before he can, Roland chuckles. “Relax, I’m just playing. I know what you meant.” 

That entire inhale escapes Andrew, becoming a relieved hiss between his teeth. 

“Besides, I had… let’s call it an inkling.” Roland’s smirk brings that blush on Andrew’s cheeks back full force. 

“An inkling?!”

“Well, yeah. I noticed you staring.” 

Andrew feels like he’s going to choke on air. How fucking embarrassing. 

“...it was kinda cute.” 

Oh. 

Oh. Shit.

Oh, shit. 

Andrew risks a glance to the side, looking at Roland who still sits there, relaxed, head leaning back against the wall of the shed, smoking, grinning. His teeth are even whiter and nicer in the moonlight. 

“Sorry, did I fluster you?”, he asks.

“No, it’s fine.”, Andrew grunts in response, way too fast. 

“Well, alright.” Roland smirks. 

They sit in silence for another minute, Andrew not knowing what to say (even though he really wishes he would) and Roland seeming comfortable and slightly amused. 

Eventually, Roland shifts, bringing himself a few inches closer to Andrew casually. Andrew can smell the smoke on him.

“And now?”

“And now, what?”, Andrew asks dumbly. His heart beats into his throat. 

“You wanna make out?” 

Andrew feels a sudden rush of tingles, on his scalp, the back of his neck and down his spine, until it settles… well. Lower down. It’s such a strong sensation that he has to suppress a shudder. 

He stares at Roland for a beat. 

He’s never wanted anything more than this right now. 

“...yeah.”

Roland’s smirk broadens. He stubs out the cigarette and leans forward. 

Andrew doesn’t move. 

When Roland’s mouth meets his, he closes his eyes.

-

Andrew learns a lot about himself and other things in those following weeks. 

He learns that kissing someone is incredibly fun.

He learns that the bleachers behind the school are a really good make-out spot.

He learns that hickeys are way less fun and way more of a hassle to hide than books make them out to be. 

He learns that, when Roland kisses his neck, it makes his mind spin hard enough to give him vertigo. 

  
  


He learns that having someone to make out with on the regular makes it way easier to forget Neil’s facebook pictures and all those pretty girls he seems to hang out with, and how things were before Neil went to England. 

-

_ Hey Drew… is everything okay? You haven’t replied to my messages forever :( _

That damn sad emoji at the end of the sentence is making Andrew feel really, really extra bad. Fuck that emoji. 

For a while, making out with Roland was a very good excuse not to check facebook regularly. But that can’t last forever, and so Andrew has to check his inbox at some point. 

What he finds is lots of messages from Neil; photos, stories from his travels, and a few  _ miss you _ s somewhere in between. The messages make Andrew’s stomach churn uncomfortably- he feels really guilty about not messaging Neil back. 

The entire time, he’d known it was wrong to just ignore the messages, but right now, he really regrets it. 

“Shit.”, he murmurs to himself, hands hovering over the keyboard. 

_ sorry, I was busy _

He deletes that immediately. 

_ sorry, I kinda have a boyfrie- _

NOPE. Delete.

He wonders if he could lie to Neil. He doesn’t want to, but maybe he should? That way, he could get out of having to explain… just, so much to Neil. 

But it’s Neil- his best friend since… forever. 

Slowly, Andrew starts typing. 

_ Hey… sorry for not replying, that was shit. Idk I guess I just had to think about a few things, lots of stuff happened during this summer. I’ll tell you everything when you’re back home. Your photos look awesome, how was Paris? Did you eat snails?  _

He pauses, and then adds a quick  _ miss you too, asshat  _

Neil doesn’t reply that same day, but the next morning, Andrew wakes up to a message from him that reads:  _ sounds ominous but okay… can’t wait to talk to u.  _

He feels a little better after that, but still a little shitty, too. 

  
  


-   
  


“Don’t give me a hickey!”, Andrew gasps, but doesn’t pull away, either. Roland’s mouth feels way too good on the side of his neck. 

“I’m not.” Roland’s voice is muffled by Andrew’s shoulder. 

They’re crammed into Roland’s twin sized bed- his mother is out working, and so they have a few blissful hours of time for… well. Many things. Mostly making out. 

In two days, Neil is coming back. Andrew knows this, it’s in the back of his head the entire time he’s kissing Roland, like an ever-present thrum of guilt. 

_ I’ll tell you everything when you’re back home _ , he’d messaged Neil. Would he, though? Could he tell Neil about Roland? Could he tell him about all of the times they’d made out somewhere? About the time Andrew had smoked? About… many things that have happened during Neil’s stay in Europe? He keeps thinking about how Neil would react to the news of Andrew and Roland. There are a dozen different scenarios in Andrew’s head. Would he be angry at Andrew? Disappointed? Would he be  _ happy _ for Andrew? Or just… not care? Andrew really doesn’t know what would be worse. 

“Hey, you okay? We can stop.” Roland’s voice rips Andrew out of his thoughts. Andrew gives a brief grunt as a response- he shouldn’t let himself think so much. He tries to kiss Roland again, but Roland pulls back, looking down at him with a quizzical look. 

“Are you sure? You’ve kind of been in your head all day.” There is a trace of hurt on his face, but mostly concern. 

Andrew closes his eyes for a second, and wipes his hand over his face. “...fuck.” 

Roland, eyes still on him, sits up. “...what’s wrong?”

“Fuck.”, Andrew repeats, pushing himself up to sit against the headboard. Now he feels even shittier for having disappointed Roland as well. “...sorry. I swear it’s not because of you.” 

Roland simply raises a brow at him, but his posture relaxes just a little. “What is it, then?” 

Andrew shrugs. Apart from making out, Roland and him have been talking, too. And Roland is pretty great, he’s a… he’s a good friend, Andrew realizes suddenly. Not just someone to make out with. 

Which… makes things maybe even more complicated. 

“I feel like a dick.”, he admits, eyes on his knees. There’s a thread hanging out from the seam on the side of his jeans and he picks it. 

“Why?”

Andrew thinks about why. Because he was a dick to Neil. Because he didn’t reply to his messages. Because he feels guilty about making out with Roland, but does it anyway. Because Roland is really cool and Andrew feels like he’s somehow using him. Because sometimes, when he kisses Roland, he imagines it’s Neil.

“...I… I think I’m kind of… in love with someone.”

There.

Andrew can’t believe he just said that. He can’t look up at Roland. 

There is a brief pause, and then Roland says: “I assume it’s not me?”

Andrew can’t believe he feels even shittier now as he shakes his head. He barely dares to look up, but forces himself to. 

Luckily, Roland just gives him a lopsided smile. 

“...not really surprised, Andrew. It’s okay, don’t worry.” He gently nudges Andrew’s shin. 

“I’m sorry.”, Andrew says, feeling really lame, “You’re really cool.”

“I know, but thanks.” Roland gives him a wink. After a pause, he adds, “...it’s Neil, right?”

Andrew can feel his cheeks heat up, but nods. He’s told Roland about Neil, of course- he wonders, now, when Roland might have caught on. “That obvious?”

Roland shrugs, leaning back on his bed, back meeting the wall. “It’s just… when you talk about him, it’s like… it’s different to when you talk about other friends.” 

“How?”

“I dunno.” Roland shrugs. “...softer, I guess.”

Andrew groans. Fuck. 

Roland tips his head back and laughs softly- Andrew can’t help but smile a little. 

“I really hope, Andrew, that this is not your first straight boy crush.”

Andrew’s smile faints a little. “...me too.” 

They’re quiet for a moment. 

“...should we stop… hanging out, then?”, Roland asks eventually.

“No!”, Andrew says way to fast, and then “...maybe. No. Yes. I like you, you’re cool… I just…”

“...hanging out is okay, but making out isn’t?”

Andrew sighs. This sucks, majorly. It’s fun to make out with Roland. But is it worth it if he feels bad about it after? 

“...yeah…” 

Roland gives him a sad smile, nudging his knee with his fist before getting up and reaching for his shirt to put it back on.

Andrew, kicked into motion by that, moves to stand up, reflexively checking for his phone in the back pocket of his jeans. He absent-mindedly pulls it out to check the time.

_ 7 new messages _

_ 2 missed calls by Dad  _

_ 3 missed calls by The Clone _

Oh shit. Andrew’s heart drops and he scrambles to open the messages.

Dad, 3:37

_ Andrew, your mother is going into labour _

Dad, 3:58

_ Where are you? _

Dad, 4:01

_ We’re going to the hospital now. _

The Clone, 3:40

_ Answer your phone, shithead!!!!!!!!! _

The Clone, 4:32

_ I’m at home, mom and dad are at the hospital _

The Clone, 4:45

_ Come home so we can go there together once the baby is born _

The Clone, 5:02

_ Andrewwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  _

“I gotta go!”

Andrew leaves a very confused Roland behind as he rushes out to find his bike and speed home.

-

Alice’s summer car sits in the driveway, sleek and black. Andrew doesn’t even stop to marvel at the beauty of it. Instead, he carelessly tosses his bike down in the front yard and hurries inside. 

Very anticlimactically, he finds both Alice and Aaron in the living room, both of their phones on the table, with the TV running. 

Aaron, however, jumps up from his seat when he spots Andrew. He looks pale. “Where were you?!” 

“With a friend!”, Andrew spits out, feeling like he’s lying. Monster, who has run to greet him, is pressing herself against his legs. 

“Oh, you mean with Roland?”, Aaron asks with venom in his voice, “I hope making out was worth it.” 

“Shut up!” 

“Boys!”, Alice interrupts their fighting, sounding surprisingly adult, “Stop it. Sit down, both of you. Andrew’s here now, it’s fine.” 

She gives Andrew a little smile. “...hi by the way.”

“Hi.”, Andrew says sheepishly. Aaron, with one last glare at him, sits back down while Andrew hesitates. 

“...sit down, Andrew. We’ll have to wait for news- it might take a few hours.” Alice pats the free spot next to her. Monster sees that as an invitation and leaps onto the couch with gusto, almost pushing Alice over. 

“...is she okay?”, Andrew asks. His heart is still racing from his speedy bike ride here. His voice sounds smaller than intended. 

“She’s okay so far, the contractions came pretty quickly though so your Dad took her to the hospital right away.”, Alice explains, rearranging Monster in her lap. Andrew realizes how little he knows about childbirth- Mom explained a few things but it’s not like he really paid attention. 

“They’ll give us a call once the baby is here, okay? Relax.”

Andrew huffs out a breath, but sits down because that’s really the only thing he can do right now. 

They watch reruns of Friends, but none of them is really paying attention- even Alice keeps checking her phone constantly. 

When it suddenly starts ringing, she jumps harder than both Aaron and Andrew, but when she looks at the caller ID, her expression turns from worried to just tense. She picks it up, but immediately stands up and leaves the room.

Aaron and Andrew exchange a glance- it can’t be Dad. Aaron reaches out and puts the TV on silent. From the kitchen, they can hear Alice’s muffled voice.

“...no news. ...yeah… I’m trying, babe. Hm. ….hm. Yeah. That’s a good idea. ...I’ll see you later. Love you too.”

Andrew feels himself blush- they just listened in to a private conversation, obviously. 

Footsteps approach, and Aaron scrambles to put the TV’s volume back on.

Alice stands in the doorframe, hands on her hips, looking at them with her brows furrowed. 

Then she says, “...I’ve had enough of this sitting around. Let’s go to Chipotle.” 

-

  
  


Eating and being out of the house makes things a little more bearable. On the car ride to the restaurant, Andrew sends a quick text to Roland.

_ sry i left so quickly. my mom is having the baby _

Roland texts him back a few minutes later. 

_ don’t worry ;) good luck to your mom i guess? and congrats on being a big brother _

Andrew hesitates, but then opens facebook. 

_ hey, you’re probably sleeping rn but I just wanted to let you know the baby is coming  _

He locks his phone after that and puts it into his pocket. 

-

The call comes when Andrew is just stuffing the last piece of burrito into his mouth. 

Alice almost drops the phone, her fingers slippery with sauce, but then manages to wedge it in between her ear and her shoulder. 

“Yes?” A big smile spreads on her face as she listens to Dad talk on the other end of the line. Andrew can hear his heart hammer in his ears suddenly. “...we’re coming. See you in a minute.” 

Before she can even terminate the call, Aaron asks, “Is the baby here?”

Alice nods quickly, that big excited smile still on her face. “Yes. Let’s go meet your little sister.” 

-

Dad meets them on the hallway of the ob/gyn ward. Everything is pink and powdery-looking in here, and there’s nurses hurrying from one room to the next, talking to each other in hushed tones. Andrew feels very out of place.

Dad looks tired, but really, really happy. The first thing he does is hug both Aaron and Andrew against his sides, squeezing them tightly. 

“Ready to meet your little sister?”, he asks, and they both nod quickly.

He leads them into one of the rooms. 

Mom sits in the bed, looking tired and sweaty, but she smiles widely once she sees them. “My boys!” There’s a tiny little bundle in her arms, wrapped in a blanket.

Aaron breaks away from Dad the instant he sees her, throwing his arms around her. Andrew isn’t far behind him. 

“Careful, sweetie.”, Mom says gently, but leans her head against Aaron’s before blowing a kiss at Andrew over his shoulder. “Hi, baby.”

“Hi, mom.”, Andrew says quietly. 

His eyes fall on the bundle in her arms. The bundle that has a tiny, red face, tiny, curled lips, a tiny nose and tiny, closed eyes. 

Mom follows his gaze, and smiles. “...she’s sleeping right now. Tired herself out.” 

She angles the baby in the direction of the twins. Aaron actually gasps softly. “...she’s so small.”

Dad comes to stand on the other side of the bed, gently putting a hand on Mom’s shoulder. 

“... her name is Annika. To match you guys’ names.”

“Annika.”, Andrew repeats quietly. His little sister Annika. 

-

_ Hey Neil,  _

_ mom and the baby are fine. Her name is Annika and she’s so small. She’s like a doll, really tiny. Mom asked me if I wanted to hold her and I almost said No because I was scared I might drop her. Anyways. _

_ I miss you, and I’m sorry that I was a dick to you. I promise I’ll explain it to you when you’re back.  _

_ I’m really looking forward to seeing you again. When does your flight land? _

_ Miss you. _

_ Andrew _

**Author's Note:**

> Comment and let me know what you think! :)


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